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Dad jokes

Started By KadinB , Sep 28 2021 4:30 PM

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160 replies to this topic

#141 Offline T.C. - Posted November 11 2022 - 1:06 AM

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med_gallery_1073_1156_25455.png


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“If I am killed for simply living, let death be kinder than man.” -Althea Davis

#142 Offline ANTdrew - Posted November 28 2022 - 2:21 PM

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Why were the elephants kicked out of the pool?

For swimming with their trunks down.
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"The ants are a people not strong, yet they prepare their meat in the summer." Prov. 30:25
Keep ordinary ants in extraordinary ways.

#143 Offline Locness - Posted November 29 2022 - 9:06 AM

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What did the leaf-cutter queen say to the worker for a job well done?

 

Atta girl!


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#144 Offline ANTdrew - Posted November 29 2022 - 12:09 PM

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What do you call this forum in the winter??

Snore-miculture…
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"The ants are a people not strong, yet they prepare their meat in the summer." Prov. 30:25
Keep ordinary ants in extraordinary ways.

#145 Offline bmb1bee - Posted November 29 2022 - 9:36 PM

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How do worker ants complain? 

They r-ANT.

 

Why can't peach trees talk during winter?

Because they're left speachless.


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"Float like a butterfly sting like a bee, his eyes can't hit what the eyes can't see." - Muhammad Ali

 

Check out my shop and Camponotus journal! Discord user is bmb1bee if you'd like to chat.

#146 Offline Locness - Posted January 3 2023 - 1:52 PM

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What music do Pogonomyrmex listen to?

 

Bluegrass.


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#147 Offline bmb1bee - Posted January 3 2023 - 9:14 PM

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Why do Colobopsis score so low on their math exams?

 

Because they can be thickheaded sometimes.


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"Float like a butterfly sting like a bee, his eyes can't hit what the eyes can't see." - Muhammad Ali

 

Check out my shop and Camponotus journal! Discord user is bmb1bee if you'd like to chat.

#148 Offline Locness - Posted January 4 2023 - 3:25 PM

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What kind of food do Myrmecocystus like?

 

Mexicanus.  :facepalm:


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#149 Offline ColAnt735 - Posted January 4 2023 - 4:30 PM

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Why do people take an extra pair of socks golfing? In case they get a hole in one.

Where do you learn to make a banana split? Sundae school.

I don’t trust those trees, they seem shady.

Edited by ColAnt735, January 4 2023 - 4:35 PM.

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"If an ant carries an object a hundred times it's weight,you can carry burdens many times your size.

#150 Offline ColAnt735 - Posted January 5 2023 - 7:59 AM

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Why are Seagulls called Seagulls? Because if they flew over a bay they’d be called bagels.


Edited by ColAnt735, January 6 2023 - 7:05 AM.

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"If an ant carries an object a hundred times it's weight,you can carry burdens many times your size.

#151 Offline bmb1bee - Posted January 5 2023 - 6:07 PM

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Why are Seagulls called Seagulls? Because if they flew over a bay they’d be call bagels.

Have you been taking dad joke classes??


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"Float like a butterfly sting like a bee, his eyes can't hit what the eyes can't see." - Muhammad Ali

 

Check out my shop and Camponotus journal! Discord user is bmb1bee if you'd like to chat.

#152 Offline lazyant - Posted January 5 2023 - 6:44 PM

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My wife asked me to stop singing “Wonderwall” to her. I said maybe...

 

What kind of drink can be bitter and sweet? Reali-tea.

 

What would the Terminator be called in his retirement? The Exterminator.

 

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"Loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix." -Comic book guy 

#153 Offline ANTdrew - Posted January 27 2023 - 2:11 PM

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Why are Myrmecocystus so expensive now?

Because they’re inflated.
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"The ants are a people not strong, yet they prepare their meat in the summer." Prov. 30:25
Keep ordinary ants in extraordinary ways.

#154 Offline ColAnt735 - Posted January 28 2023 - 4:38 PM

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Why are Myrmecocystus so expensive now?

Because they’re inflated.

This one hit differently. I actually cringed.


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"If an ant carries an object a hundred times it's weight,you can carry burdens many times your size.

#155 Offline bmb1bee - Posted January 30 2023 - 8:46 PM

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What do winged queens say when they eclose right after nuptial flight season?

 

I'm a-late!


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"Float like a butterfly sting like a bee, his eyes can't hit what the eyes can't see." - Muhammad Ali

 

Check out my shop and Camponotus journal! Discord user is bmb1bee if you'd like to chat.

#156 Offline ANTdrew - Posted February 5 2023 - 7:40 AM

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What do you call an isopod father??

An isopadre
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"The ants are a people not strong, yet they prepare their meat in the summer." Prov. 30:25
Keep ordinary ants in extraordinary ways.

#157 Offline KadinB - Posted April 10 2023 - 6:19 PM

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bump/revive attempt


#158 Offline ANTdrew - Posted April 11 2023 - 1:52 AM

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How did the Easter bunny prepare for Easter?

He got a hare cut.

Edited by ANTdrew, April 11 2023 - 1:52 AM.

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"The ants are a people not strong, yet they prepare their meat in the summer." Prov. 30:25
Keep ordinary ants in extraordinary ways.

#159 Offline AntsCali098 - Posted April 11 2023 - 9:02 AM

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Heres kind of a knock knock dad joke

 

- Knock Knock

 

- Who's there?

 

- Lettuce 

 

- Lettuce who?

 

- Lettuce (let us) in, its cold outside!

 

Sorry


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Interested buying in ants? Feel free to check out my shop! 

Feel free to read my journals, like this one.

 

Wishlist:

Atta sp (wish they were in CA), Crematogaster cerasi, Most Pheidole species

 

 

#160 Offline Amatty76 - Posted April 20 2023 - 10:19 AM

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What's white on the outside green on the inside and hops?

 

A frog sandwich.


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